The Pickering Post
Monday, 25th March 2019

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Vanuatu might be a sunny place for shady people,


Larry Pickering

Four-time Walkley Award winning political commentator and Churchill Fellow, has returned to the fray over concern that the integrity of news dissemination is continually being threatened by a partisan media.


As was reported here last month, “even the Stick Insect and Julia Gillard can’t compete with China when it comes to chucking foreign aid around the Pacific”. 

Vanuatu was an Anglo-French Condominium from 1906 to independence in 1980 and when I was there only 160,000 inhabitants occupied 70 odd islands with a hundred or so uninhabited. 

The French have an interest in Vanuatu as does Australia and in particular New Zealand where just about every Kiwi crook who is not welcome anywhere escapes to. 

The place is a den of tribal iniquity where busted accountants and disbarred lawyers are free to bribe whoever they want including dodgy black, and even white, judges in ever-changing, alternating parties that win office by promising more holidays than the opposing party… holidays like “Children’s Day” and “No Smoking Day”, add to those all the French holidays, Australian and New Zealand holidays and there is very little work going on. Everything runs on “Island Time”.

As usual, whities are hated and occasionally killed with bush knives seemingly without penalty. They have a law against guns in Vanuatu because they understand guns would rapidly reduce the population close to zero. 

Few people know but, less than two hours east of Cairns, cannibals still happily survive, shrinking heads and practising their traditions, as they have done for ten thousand years. 

I have close friends who are cannibals. People who must, and will remain under their law, my friends for life. 

By tribal law they must still kill a pig and prepare a feast if I return at any time. Due to my time there in search and rescue, I have a room full of hand-woven mats that took women of the islands many months to make. And I didn’t try to teach them English either, I learnt their language because I was on their Islands. It wasn’t hard.  

Through lack of respect, European invaders made others pronounce English words. At least they thought they did. The trouble was that they needed to teach them the alphabet first. They didn’t bother doing that. Thus, unknowingly, they had only taught them sounds. [Conversely, the English thought Indians were saying Bombay but it was actually Mumbai they were saying.] Yep! of course they got all the sounds wrong because they had no alphabet to picture or form a word with.  

So, two hundred years later, when an alphabet was finally taught to a few Pacific islanders, the poor bastards tried to fit the sounds to this new fucking device called an alphabet. 

It left them with the comical Bishlama, and Pidgin English. The sound “him, me” was spelt “emme”, “belong” was spelt “blong and contracted to “blo”. The French brassier made no sense at all so became “barskit blo titte”. “Muscat blo wier” was a spear gun. (Any extruded metal is wire.) A glove was spelt “han blo glub”. What else could be expected? "Kill im" means to hit him, Really kill 'im is pronounced "Kill'im dead", Oh dear. 

When we say a word like, “FOOD” we can picture the spelling. We mentally see an F, two Os and a D. If we are not sure of any spelling, the first thing we do is grab a pen and write the word down, so we can see the alphabetic picture. 

What does someone with no knowledge of an alphabet write down or picture? How does one picture a sound without letters? 

Accurate perception of another’s language is not possible without the yardstick of a shared alphabet.

When I landed my Jetranger chopper there I was told it now belonged to the Vanuatu government and I had to fly it wherever they said or they would arrange for another pilot to commandeer it. There were only two other chopper pilots in the entire archipelago, and they were killed trying to save Nivans from inaccessible sites. I went along with them… for about 7 damned years.

I was tasked mostly with search and rescue missions that were dangerous and without payment. Sometimes if I pressured a government Minister with a bottle of perfume wrapped in a 5000 vatu note (around 65 bucks) he would arrange for the jet fuel to be paid through Air Vanuatu’s account.

[Perfume is at a premium for Ministers as Nivans have such a foul smell they are only allowed sex when they are drenched in perfume, any type of cheap perfume will do the trick.]

They are a simple, yet street-smart, people the sophisticated Chinese would easily, but must not be allowed to, manipulate. 

Everyone who is European in Vanuatu has house boys and girls. At $A5 a week, why not? My neighbour told his boys to clear all the rubbish up in his front yard: “Put all the stuff in the ute and take everything down the tip and burn it.” 

A few hours later his boys were seen walking back from the tip… they had burnt the ute as well. “The lot” means “the lot”. “Everything!” Does it not?

The country lives on a high VAT rate, off-shore betting company commissions, and of course foreign aid. Around $70 million from Australia, a pittance from New Zealand and who knows how much from France and elsewhere, including China.

France, Australia, the UK and New Zealand should put up fierce resistance to China’s expansionism in an area so close to Australia. Vanuatu will oblige anyone with enough money to buy the family members of the Government a new Mercedes each year. 

And with China now building the roads on which they can be driven and new houses for Government members, Vanuatu will readily agree to anything including nuclear testing on the main island of Efate.

                  Nivans display their ink stained fingers to prove they have voted.

Nivans have no age records... they are either young or old, which they describe as "before war" or "after war". This area was bitterly fought for in The Battle of the Coral Sea.   

No Australian Government Member will understand what makes Vanuatu tick like I do… that’s how I survived there for so long.

Head of State, Baldwin Lonsdale has expressed sorrow to the Government, the people of Vanuatu and the world, for what he described as the “unlawful decision” made by Acting Head of State, Marcellino Pipite, to pardon 14 members of parliament including himself, in the President’s absence and without his knowledge, in the bribery case which they were all found guilty of in 2015.

This is normal Vanuatu Government business.

The Government used Australian aid money to buy the privately-owned Air Vanuatu Company at a ridiculous price of twice its agreed value. They then gave all their relatives free flights to anywhere they wanted to go, they double charged everyone else who was black and triple charged the whities. 

The new “government” airline went broke of course. 

The Australian reported this year: "One of the most disastrously ­implemented aid projects in the South Pacific is being delivered by the Australian government, with a $31 million roads project in Vanuatu far behind schedule, millions of dollars over budget and of very poor quality."                         

The Port Vila Urban Development Project, announced in February of 2013 by the then foreign minister (you guessed it) Bob Carr, was due to be finished years ago but ­remains far from completion and has been labelled a “comedy of errors” by locals.

They neither need nor want our aid, but we need “friends” in Pacific outposts. The US has done the same in the Caribbean for fear of former Soviet-supported Cuba's communist influence.

Humanitarian aid never gets to those who need it and it never will, because the black man knows how to rip-off his fellow black. The black has no compassion for any person other than himself and his own immediate family.

Development is not an issue as two educated Nivans explained:  "Australia has long held an ideological opposition to the way of life of our people in Vanuatu. Customary land, our traditions, our ‘subsistence’ culture and ‘informal’ economy are seen as inherent impediments to development. Our perspective and values are not taken into consideration because countries like Australia see only the need for economic growth." ...They are correct

Aid-giving rich countries do not know what happens to this largesse. They know almost none of it gets to where it should, but they make no effort to ensure it is administered correctly. If they did, it would be called, “interference in the sovereignty of….”. 

Ok, if any of you moronic gift-giving governments really want to know, and I actually tell you, what happens to your (our) aid, will you do something about it? 

Of course not, but I’ll tell you what happens to our money anyway: 

Natives have a totem power pole. Forget democratic elections… elections only reinforce and celebrate a power structure that is already there.  

                              A Nivan family celebrates what they have stolen

Blacks ruthlessly and systematically steal from whoever is weaker. We care a lot more for their “poor” than they do. Yet no Pacific Islander is hungry. The Pacific is permanently awash with an over-abundance of myriad natural foods.  

When unneeded, geopolitical aid money arrives in large amounts the smart blacks in “government” know there will be a modicum of accountability expected from the donor. So, they leave the money in an “understandably crooked” bank where it can be “audited”. 

Now, the second echelon of black bureaucracy takes over. They are the ones who open tax-free agencies called “Poor Peoples Help Pty Ltd” or “Aid to AIDs Sufferers Pty Ltd”, “The Christian Care Trust” or the like… there are thousands of these shell companies. 

To become an aid “agency”, you need to be licensed by the “government” with whom you are friendly and you will never pay any tax again. This is where the scam begins. The licence costs the amount of the initial requested funds. The licence fee goes straight into the pockets of the government “ministers” and their lackeys. 

These “agencies” willingly pay this amount from previous profits, because they can now issue further “sub-licences” to “distribute” aid money to a dozen other “agencies” further down the line…they pocket those “licence” fees, and so it continues all the way down the totem pole until, when it reaches the poor people, there is nothing left of the original funds that were intended to assist them.  

When the foreign aid account is audited, it appears all the money has been properly distributed. No-one, apparently, has scammed any of it. But they all have. The “government” has given it to the agencies and the agencies have simply given it straight back to the “government” via licence fees. All appears in order to any stupid Western Government. 

The foreign aid envoys are shouted a traditional feast by the receiving “government”, handed a copy of the audited report by an international firm of crooked accountants, like Moores Rowland, KPMG or Moores Stephens, and they visit “recipients” of the aid at the grass roots level… which is a pre-arranged village showpiece. 

The envoys go home with a warm feeling that the foreign aid has been wisely spent and they recommend that it be continued. They dare not ask to see the real system of distribution further down the line as this would be a racist affront and intolerable interference in a foreign government’s sovereign process. 

Anyway there is nothing to see, except many organisations that are, apparently, wisely distributing aid. 

When a television documentary team arrives to see what the fuck is going on they are escorted by the military to the same pre-arranged showpiece village. 

Food aid is corrupted in exactly the same way. Food in other parts of the world is as much a currency as is a dollar note. But these islanders aren’t short of food, they are short of roads, hospitals and schools. 

Rich, aid-giving Western nations foolishly believe poor black nations actually care about their needy. They don’t. They never have. Foreign aid is nothing more than a vehicle for perpetuating corrupt administrations and lining the pockets of the very people who don’t need it. 

Poor black recipient nations have always operated this way. They are a simple people who are also ruthlessly street-smart. We taught them.

The world knows full-well that aid is not delivered to those it was intended to assist, but why should gifting governments care… it’s not their money is it? It’s ours, and people like the Stick Insect can show off their gifting wares to the gullible, Islamic dominated UN.

Vanuatu easily beats Canberra with 22 changes of prime minister since 1980.

Natives have no consideration for their fellow natives unless they are from the same island and the same family. They have invaded and killed each other from neighbouring islands for thousands of years and they are still enemies. 

One of 14 convicted Nivan politicians, Willie Jimmy, leaves court but all were pardoned                                                  in the President's absence. 

Vanuatu is corrupt to the core and screams of sovereign rights can be heard back in Canberra if ever we deign to ask what the hell they are spending these free millions on.

The truth is that only family members are the recipients. Very little is spent on much needed infrastructure and that won’t happen without the obligatory greasing of the appropriate palms.

The Australian Government supplied free to Vanuatu a full range of top-shelf search and rescue equipment, including HF and VHF radios, nets, ladders, winches, medicines, etc to try to limit the number of native deaths on outlying islands. 

I was not allowed to use this equipment unless I paid a Vanuatu Government Minister his asking price of $A100,000 for this equipment. I was confined to making my own (rather dodgy) rope ladders, strops and nets at home, yet it was their fellow Nivans who needed rescuing.

The main problem was the outlying Islanders’ reef fishing. They tuck their freshly speared and bleeding fish in their coconut pulp belts. This of course attracts the abundant sharks that take not only the fish but a freely available limb or two. The problem for me was getting there and back before these poor bastards bled out. Very few made it.

Unseaworthy, listing, rust buckets, inappropriately called ships, transport natives and their trades between islands, many hundreds at a time, they regularly sink without trace in the 4,000 metre deep currents. No news coverage back here as there is no footage. 

In the aftermath of a catastrophic tsunami just east of The Banks, a remote archipelago nearer to the Solomons, in 1998 (not reported here) only the steeple of a church remained above the mountains of sand dumped on the village by the massive rotating wave. People were dying from horrific injuries. 

They would not allow my helicopter to transport the injured back to Port Vila hospital until all the dead were returned to their islands of birth. Of course, by the time I figured out how to accomplish this Herculean task, the badly injured had also died, I was out of fuel, and the process had to be repeated until no-one would be saved. Hundreds died, but more importantly (to them) the dead were buried where they were born. 

But they weren’t, I had cheated and dropped nets full of numerous dead bodies into another coral quay further south and had hoped the sharks would clean them up before anyone noticed. Still only four or five of the injured were saved when I returned them to Port Vila Hospital. 

                            (a hospital which is a fate worse than death anyway).

What I’m trying to say with just a couple of thousands of stories about Vanuatu, China must not be allowed a presence there.

Nivans will be like putty in Chinese hands and Nivans will agree to anything involving money, 

...much of which will be against our interests. 


She is the best advertisement for the full burka that I have ever seen. Too ugly to wear that curtain she currently calls a headress

Be...ute...i...ful!! Couldn't happen to a nicer person! It should bring her ego down a peg or two....or will she play the victim?

With all the shit in your fishbowl Kym , it was considered essential. A community service.

i understand that the rules used to be that the airline would be fined ...wonder if the airline will recoup their money ?? or take it out of her hide ???

hilarious....hahahahaha......couldn't have happened to nice idiot.

the tropical beef cattle centre at Rockhampton bred and supplied cattle to Vanuatu as part of an aid program and for them to establish a beef industry. The cattle wander around under the plantations, eating the grass under the coconut or cocoa trees. After a few years the australian scientists noticed that the herds were not increasing and some in fact had gone backwards. One group took all their instruments over to test and monitor the cattle etc. My neighbour a talented scientist and cattle expert just interviewed the locals and sure enough, they talked about whenever a significant person had a birthday they would knock a beast on the head and have a feast. So much for our monies and so much for their help in establishing a Vanuatu beef industry.

Been to vanuatu twice in the last year. The new customs building in Port Vila looks like a Chinese temple, the Chinese embassy is enormous and the information I was given was that the Chinese Govt. loaned Vanuatu the money to set up their airline (just under a billion A$), then forgave them the debt. Their local newspapers carry many stories suggesting Chinese influence is already in force.

A number of athletes from crap hole countries go awol during the Com, Games Who would have thunk it! After getting to a first world country they disappear into the suburbs, Just imagine what problems they they have in Europe with over stayers,Cant blame them , but rules are rules and we take far too many migrants already , we are doing our bit for the third world , in fact more than most countries ,Of course getting a gullible aussie woman pregnant seems to work in getting the aussie via stakes!

Thanks for the headsup Kym.

Ptomaine Torbay has found a nice damp rock to hide under. Somewhere up Armidale way.
What a lowlife!

Yes I can see that in you, now that you mention it.

Polls consistently showed Torbay well-positioned to reclaim the seat that had been in National hands for 79 years before Windsor won it in 2001. However, on 19 March 2013, in a surprise move, the Nationals forced Torbay to stand down as the party's candidate in New England and resign his party membership.[7] Later that night, the Nationals referred information about him to the NSW Independent Commission Against Corruption.[8][9] The following morning Torbay also resigned his seat in State Parliament.[10]

It later emerged that the Nationals had received word that Torbay had received illicit donations from Labor interests to run against National Party candidates in Northern Tablelands. They were also alarmed by his ties to Labor power-broker Eddie Obeid ...

I wonder when his NSW Bagman Richard Torbay now former MLA will reappear? When the ICAC summoned him he resigned from politics, closed his law office in Armidale and not been in the news since. He apparently handed out the support monies to other so called independent state and federal members.

Dodgy Bros. incorporated is a registered trademark for the Obeid Family,
please take a number and wait your turn Elsa.

Yep, I agree with Marco.

Find out who actually stamped her deportation order , I reckon we should pass the hat around so we can send that person a carton of piss and a box of Kentucky fried chicken for their exceptional service to the security of their nation in repelling this undesirable woman

Speaker of what subject did she intend to earbash our esteemed allies with before she got turfed out of the US of A ?