The Pickering Post
Tuesday, 12th December 2017

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THE CLASH OF THE CODES

Larry Pickering

Four-time Walkley Award winning political commentator and Churchill Fellow, has returned to the fray over concern that the integrity of news dissemination is continually being threatened by a partisan media.

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In a surprise move Collingwood has begun beheading those who follow other codes. They showed no mercy when storming St George’s Leagues Club waving black and white flags and spraying poker machine players with AK47 rounds while screaming “Collingwood is great”, “death to non-believers” and “behead all those who insult Eddie McGuire”.

It was widely reported that up to 400 radicalised players from interstate clubs had travelled to Melbourne to join the Collingwood Caliphate, but Tony Abbott was quick to reassure the public, angrily declaring that, “these people are being closely monitored” and a furious Premier Baird rushed to a Press conference claiming, “they may not be allowed back into NSW”.

“This has nothing to do with Aussie Rules”, screamed the ABC and The Age, “Collingwood is a religion of peace”.

The Guardian On-line led with, “SPORTING VIOLENCE A GROWING CONCERN” but counselled its readers against over-reacting to redneck claims that 30,000 well armed Collingwood fanatics were descending on the offices of the Premier League.

In a breaking development it was reported a bomb had exploded in the Essendon Club rooms but fortunately no-one was there. The Collingwood players group had quickly claimed responsibility, tweeting “convert or die” and released a video of David Gallop in an orange jumpsuit declaring he would be decapitated unless all codes converted to Aussie Rules and followed the teachings of Collingwood.

Sarah Hanson-Young said that boys will be boys, discounting Jacqui Lambie’s claim that Collingwood “only cares about winning” and that she will not put up with Magpie Law. “And I won’t agree to anything until indigenous players are paid more”, Jacqui said.

“It’s no wonder we are losing ‘moderate’ Aussie Rules players to Collingwood” said James Hird. “We can’t compete with rewards of 72 virtuous black and white birds.”

Tony Abbott again called for tea and bickies with spiritual leaders of all football clubs to resolve the issue. “Let me make this clear, this has nothing to do with the Magpies”, he said. “We have nothing to gain by marginalising an Aussie Rules club, in fact henceforth I will be referring to them as, ‘Sports people in black and white jumpers’”.

When asked for an opinion, Bill Shorten said he would rather not comment on Pies but added, “I will agree with whatever Eddie McGuire agrees to.”



Comments

I love Prince Philip's so very non-politically correct sense of humour! Now that is very Australian! ;)

It must be very embarrassing for Phil and his missus Liz in Buckingham Palace having to put up with the nastiness of their supposed loyal subjects in Australia ranting on about how un Australian Phil is supposed seeing he part of our furniture ,proof being his name is plastered all throughout our existence .

Marigold: Cec Rhodes instigated the scholarship that promoted the British Empire and it's continuation so in fact Hawke and Abbott serve the best interests of Commonwealth over that of Australia seeing we are but a branch office of the British Empire .

I reckon they'd be a market for halal certified burqa's in Collingwood colours.

Ta Philip, posting to fb groups and pages! :)

Bob Hawke was a Rhodes scholar.

And Gentleman has posted exclusively on this. Pay people to do some homework and it will fall into place. Tman told us it is a good thing our PM is a Rhodes Scholar. Make up your own mind.

No one has linked the Prince Philip Khnighthoods by Bob Hawke and Tony Abbott to them being Rhodes Scholars. This tells me people do not know what a Rhodes Scholar is and what their roles are. I have previously posted the roles of Rhodes Scholars and how they are selected to be Rhodes Scholars. Wake up Australian voters. Your PM is a Rhodes Scholar and you don't even know what that means.

And thank you for the info Philip.

This is nothing but a media beat up because of the hatred of the msn towards TA.

Time for bed...

Like is one thing 100%; but here's the big question: Do you take her at her word???

Okay guys; so Abbott handed an elite award to Phil and the skies open up. He also handed one to the skinny hypocrite Quentin Brice; and not even a whisper of contempt from the critical canyons of the ABC, the limp-wristed fog-mouths on breakfast telly; the empty loudmouths on radio; the bum-fodder magazines, and the dunces who claim to be ‘political commentators’. Brice uses the Dame name to gild her publicly-funded lifestyle, and to further her boofheaded son-in-law’s bid for The Lodge. Slag Abbott for not calling the Muslims out; not for Phil’s Knighthood. It’s over guys, let it go: we’ve got swags of real issues on the plate

Ch7 Bris. Have busted their boiler rubbishing CN and the LNP.Newman will lose his seat, LNP will lose government, Federal Coalition has gone down the gugler, Julie Bishop will form her own party, and above all, Paper Bag Turnbull is preferred Leader. Time for the drug squad up to Mt Cootha and find out where the news editor is getting his ice !!!!

I like Miranda Devine. What a great name as well.

I have always thought that a Knighthood was a French Letter or franger

Sometime in the last 60 years I must have experienced an amazing metamorphosis.In youth I was your average normal patriotic Aussie,(you know,God, King ,Country,etc)Now I am anti-Semitic,racist,homophobic,a holocaust and global warming sceptic,red neck,white supremacist.There may be more.Could it be society that is in a state of metamorphosis or do Ireally need help?

Now that the January holidays are officially over and the Servants of the Public are back on the job, maybe, just maybe we’ll see some movement in the Team Abbott camp. Could it be that Bruiser Morrison is now primed to tackle Muslim rorting in Centrelink? One thing is certain; if the Bruiser lets loose the shiz will hit the fan in a big way. Screeching Muzzies will be all over the ABC, the Project, Breakfast telly, Studio Ten and Fairfax...Can it happen? Dare we hope? On your knees, guys!

Exactly Tman

Oz I don't think too many will read this but he is in step with my thinking. I follow finances throughout the world and he is quite correct in what he predicts. We are about to witness this year the destruction of many countries. Only the rich will get richer and the poor poorer.