SHOVE THIS HOT END UP YOUR CLACKER BILL!
Four-time Walkley Award winning political commentator and Churchill Fellow, has returned to the fray over concern that the integrity of news dissemination is continually being threatened by a partisan media.
Bill Shorten is still kicking old blokes when they’re down... some innocent poor bastards who like an occasional smoke, like myself, need to pay $55 for 50g of tobacco worth around 30 cents. (My damned tobacco plants got eaten by insects.)
After they ate the first one I thought ah ah, their little legs will fall off now, they will get lung cancer and will all go blind and die a horrible death, it says so on my tobacco packet, but bugger, they didn’t die! They just kept on eating my plants!
You see, the Labor Party can only think in simple economic terms; we want to stop everyone smoking but we still need the billions in revenue, so the money lost from those who give it up is compensated for by those smokers prepared to pay the ever increasing price. Simple eh?
But Bill’s tobacconomics gets even better. You see his tobacco tax is designed to raise $4 billion to be wasted on teachers’ unions and Gillard’s ridiculous Gonski. But hang on, I’m certain I heard Bill say he wanted to stop people smoking!
Well maybe Bill is some sort of magician, because if he is successful at stopping people smoking, how the hell is he going to raise the $4 billion he needs for his unions? No-one has asked him this and I’m damned if I will bother.
Let me have a look at my packet of Drum again... yes, yes, this one says “smoking causes lung cancer” with a graphic colour pic of a cow’s mangled lungs, replete with photo-shopped lesions and a dozen or so cancerous cysts. HTF that cow ever took a breath of air I don’t know.
Cancer has nothing to do with smoking. Never has had and never will have, simply because cancer has been around since Adam and tobacco (originally snuff) was only discovered 400 years ago in the Americas.
Anyone with an IQ above their boot size can figure that simple statistic out.
And surely those hideously dishonest and deceitful coloured pics indicate the preparedness of the well-funded, unscrupulous QUIT lobby to lie. Through sheer repetitive advertising bombardment a person, even a doctor, can be convinced the colour red is actually blue.
Since the QUIT lobby has reduced smoking down to a mere 20 per cent, people are still contracting heart disease, lung cancers and diabetes at the same or, in respect of some cancers, a higher rate! Although the marked increase in breast cancers is likely the result of misdiagnoses.
But surely now that we have largely stopped people smoking, the health budget will be reduced! Nope, that budget has been blown out of the water.
There is no doubt that smoking may aggravate certain existing conditions... well, so does peanut butter, strawberries and footy.
If you want to neck yourself with a toxic substance then join a hose from your car’s exhaust and sit behind the wheel with the windows wound up for 20 minutes. Try doing that with a pack of cigarettes... you will die of old age first.
The truth is QUIT is a giant con. No-one believes their nonsense, but governments have found they can justify attacking the hip pocket nerve with cash windfalls gracing their bottomless coffers.
Check it out: The nations with the highest incidence of smoking, like Greece, Iceland and Japan, and others, can also boast the greatest longevity. Crumbs, now why the hell would that be?
So if, like the QUIT lobby, you still attribute all deaths to smoking, including those in plane crashes, then you will also believe those photo-shopped pics on my packet of Drum.