The Pickering Post
Saturday, 24th February 2018

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POPE, SUFFERING OLDTIMERS, RECKONS BIBLE IS FAKE NEWS

Larry Pickering

Four-time Walkley Award winning political commentator and Churchill Fellow, has returned to the fray over concern that the integrity of news dissemination is continually being threatened by a partisan media.

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The truth is the silly old bugger appears to have finally got one thing right (well, in a Biblical sense that is)! Yes “Satan”, in the form of a snake, (or Harvey Weinstein) lied to Eve about the value of eating forbidden fruit!  Hmmm, okay, maybe snakes could talk back then and women were silly enough to believe anything they were told, but the book of Genesis is actually entirely fake news. And, despite Il Papa’s insinuations, this time it’s not Trump’s fault.

Anyway after Harvey convinced her to swallow this illegal stuff, Eve suddenly noticed she had two pretty good tits and a yummy looking front bottom. “Wow”, she said, “I reckon I can have some fun with these.” And she did because in no time at all she produced three documented children, Cain, Abel and Seth.

As God didn't allow Eve to be on the pill at the time she probably had a few other rug rats as well. So, who bonked who from then on is a mystery, but let’s leave incest out of it for a moment. 

Cain, from memory, slew (bumped off) Abel in the field and God was displeased (bloody angry). So as a punishment, God sent Cain into the Land of Nod and put a mark upon his forehead so that, “all those who came across him would not kill him but would cast him out” (tell him in no uncertain terms to piss off) …fair enough too! I mean after all, he had just killed a close family member!

Now I tried really hard to follow the story up to here but WTF were all these people doing in the Land of Nod? Had God created another Adam and Eve somewhere and simply forgot to tell us about it? Because it seems hardly necessary to put a mark on someone’s forehead so that his siblings will know he knocked one of them off? It’s about now that I want a refund for this Bible book.

                                  Old Moses had a few tricks up his sleeve too

But I soldier on with the Old Testament until I get to Noah’s Ark. Now fair dinkum, even the Brothers Grimm couldn’t have come up with this tale after a night on the turps! We’re told it pissed down for 40 days and nights and the whole world (but very little of it was known back then) was inundated! 

According to the Bible, chronologically, the flood didn’t recede for 18 months when the Ark ran aground somewhere in Turkey. So after a year and a half without refrigeration, which animals ate one or both of the other pairs, is pure speculation, but even if both chooks survived it defeats the purpose of the whole exercise. 

Anyway koalas and kangaroos must have been pretty safe because Captain Cook wasn’t around then.

As there were no pictures in my Bible it was about then that I considered flicking it.

                                  "Hey that's a bloody parrot... hang on I'll fix it!"

                                                          "...there ya go."

Then all my religious friends told me the Old Testament was um, sort of symbolic, and that I should read on for more enlightened, credible, scriptures. Okay, so I do, and I come across a pregnant virgin who has given birth to a bloke who can walk on water, he can make blind people see, and when his mates are low on booze he can turn water into wine. 

Jeezus, that’s very impressive.

But it gets even better than the pregnant virgin bit. And by the way if my daughter gave me a story about God getting her pregnant, she would go to bed without any dinner and I’m pretty sure no-one would consider fashioning statues to her or crafting lots of stained glass windows in her image.

                                                       Good drawing 'tho

Anyway when this “wonderbloke” gets killed, as all those radical, self-styled, messianic, charlatans did, he comes alive again and floats up in the air to abide with God… and my friends are trying to tell me the New Testament is more believable than Adam and Eve? Hmmm, really?

                                        "Hmmm, tell me about that illegal entry again."

So when ol’ Il Papa says the Bible is the original “fake news” he actually believes it's NOT fake news! Otherwise he has no job, no babies get kissed, and no-one gets to talk about their sins at his (above) mobile confessional!

Crumbs, I give up!



Comments

the pope is a commie bastard.

Is Robert Mueller SWAMP? #UraniumOne #QAnon #CBTS #Russiagate
29,436 views

The Right Media
Streamed live on 26 Jan 2018
Today I dove into the past (and present) of Robert Mueller and what he's done for me to draw such a brash conclusion.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iMtYnEI7TRw

Donald Duck Trump, the compromised zio-psycho terrorist grump, is sending men to Mars (lolololol....) to bouy with taxpayer funds the North American Shithole Association's (NASA) fantasy that the fake jews of isra-hell will not be forgotten, nor will they be not compensated for trillions of years of persecution.

Trump sends out 'survivors' still living and livid of the mythical atrocities perpetrated against a mythical culture during WWll, and WWl, and any prior war, tussle, grief.

Shame shame Trump you bankrupt and fraud.

Trump, we know very well you father sucked jewish cock (Meyer Lansky) but, please, don't carry on the tradition. It serves humanity no purpose whatsoever.sai

Meanwhile back in Australia... Trump and Goldman Sucks..errr..Malcum Goldman Turdballs...sends Australians back to the stone age with no affordable heating or cooling and wait for it...lemons, cucumbers and oranges imported from JewSA... According to JewSA Australia cannot grow anything and must import power as well.

Australia only exports cold hard cash to the illegal stolen Rothschild isra-hell.

Thanks you pack of traitorous globalist vaginas.

A Filthy Jewess Terrorist Whore operating out of JewYork, Audrey Zibelman - AEMO cheif executive, has declared Australia safe this coming summer against electricity shortages and blackouts by securing 'additonal power' allocated to the Palestinians, will now be diverted to Australians.

HOW MUCH DUMBER CAN WE GET UNDER THESE PARASITIC FUCKING JEWS? NOT MUCH.

"Australia has enough power for summer: AEMO

The chance of major summer blackouts has been cut as energy operators have found extra power for the east coast.

The Australian Energy Market Operator has added almost 2000 megawatts of additional power for the summer ahead, which it says will more than replace the 1600 megawatts taken offline after Victoria's Hazelwood brown coal-fired power station closed in March.

The situation in Victoria was heightened by the recent failures of two generating units at the Loy Yang and Yallourn power stations, which removed a further 1300 megawatts of power from the state.

This drop in available coal-fired power forced Victoria to import large amounts of energy from South Australia, Tasmania and NSW and burn more gas, contributing to recent spikes in the wholesale energy price.

AEMO has now secured additional power to plug these forecast energy holes, and prepared the National Electricity Market – comprising Tasmania, South Australia, Victoria, Queensland, and NSW – for the summer ahead.

"AEMO is confident that we have taken all the necessary actions – and then some – to make sure we are ready," AEMO chief executive Audrey Zibelman said.

http://www.smh.com.au/business/energy/australia-has-enough-power-for-summer-aemo-20171127-gztzfn.html

Khazarian mafia jibberish for - vee vill fuck you goyim as long as vee can..."

Trudeau, what an asshole. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6-6tO5kHfg

TDS and in denial.

New Post Up !

True, blounty is beyond help but it's still fun to take the piss.

"You don't need anybody, you have to work it out for yourself" Life of Brian.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaOfBQ5uw6M

Joe Biden showing how America's foreign policy works, https://mobile.twitter.com/JulianAssange/status/957212097984819200/video/1

I am C-Martel the beginning and the end the Alpha and the Omega - some what of a legend in my own lunch time - insults run of me like semen form the lips of Pres Chump's wifes' lips or water off a ducks back if you will - wasting your time insulting me

JCU censures its own Professor for telling the truth … “there is nothing wrong with the Barrier Reef…”
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The Australian Institute of Marine Studies has been caught out telling porkies….
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by Don Aitkin
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Well, the pressure to conform is happening again, and at Professor Bob Carter’s old university, James Cook University in Townsville. The late Bob Carter was censured by JCU some years ago for ridiculing the Global Warming theory. This time the proposed villain is JCU professor of physics, Peter Ridd, whose interests include coastal oceanography, the effects of sediments upon coral reefs, past and future climates and atmospheric modelling. I have met Peter Ridd, and I know something about his work. He has been head of the Department of Physics for ten years. His intellectual reach is wider than my short summary here, but I have put in what gives him some status in the world of global warming.
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Professor Ridd’s comments on Sky news, to the effect that "We can no longer trust the scientific organisations like the Australian Institute of marine Science, even things like the ARC Centre of Excellence for Coral Reef Studies… The science is coming out not properly checked, tested or replicated, and this is a great shame."
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Read on -
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https://cairnsnews.org/2018/01/29/jcu-censures-its-own-professor-for-telling-the-truth-there-is-nothing-wrong-with-the-barrier-reef/

Neo-Nazi turned 'Islamic State' supporter goes on trial in Germany for bomb plans
A neo-Nazi who then became a radical Islamist faces trial in Germany over alleged plans to bomb police and soldiers. Three other defendants stand accused of aiding and abetting the plans.

http://www.dw.com/en/neo-nazi-turned-islamic-state-supporter-goes-on-trial-in-germany-for-bomb-plans/a-40596164

NEO NAZI BENDS OVER TO HIS ISLAMIC MASTERS

German far-right AfD politician converts to Islam

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-42804202

If the baby boomers weren't so fucked up or fucking hung-up about themselves none of this catastrophic reality would exist.

Let's face it, the baby boomers fucked up everything big time out of pure greed and selfishness and let the public service outgrow its usefulness to humanity and turned it in to a taxpayer funded trough for the pigs to writhe in.

It's time to take to the streets and hang these traitorous fucking grubs who refer to themselves as public servants for totally fucking Australia and raping its peoples (I know, it's a global and predictable phenomenon not restricted only to the Australian political landscape - traitorous evil fucking grubs).

So, baby boomers, you generational tapeworms who have hogged every public service imaginable, get out of your caravans and modified Harley's and scooters for the geriatrics and help us out or fuck off and die like the politicians want you to.

luv
sailor

O.T. Donald Trump says he may reconsider Trans-Pacific Partnership or TPP if America gets a better deal...Do you think "a better deal for Australia" was EVER a consideration by our Turd for the same deal considering Turds "runs on the board record?" He has given us the Paris agreement and the carbon tax by stealth just recently re carbon credits to foreign countries. He gave us SSM through an illegal "survey" totally ignoring our Constitution and his unelected wife,(with her socialist visions of grandeur is changing the face of Sinney forever. Whats the bet he will satisfy the Sect 44 debacle once and for all as a "priority" upon the resumption of Parliament? The mangy article is definitely NOT working for Australia...

President Chump is a walking thought bubble -- he is surrounded by minders and the odd sycophant and the bloke with the portable hot box containing his McDonalds -

Greens, Labor, LGBTI = against Australia; AC, PHON,LDP for Australia; Liberals/LNP for filling their own pockets. Easy peasy.

Australia now wants to take on the world by selling guns and ammo and all that war like stuff , is this a pretext for us to arm up to be ready to join in someone else's war at our expense of our body count again ?