BARNABY KEEPS HIS EYE ON THE PRIZE
... while Jacqui goes home

Larry Pickering
Four-time Walkley Award winning political commentator and Churchill Fellow, has returned to the fray over concern that the integrity of news dissemination is continually being threatened by a partisan media.

One rule of the bush is never shit close to the family tent but everything that Barnaby does seems to somehow leave a pile of nasty stuff on his shoe. His time as Shadow Finance Minister was an embarrassing debacle despite his background in accountancy. His political judgment is worse than Turnbull’s… yet he’s still the best the Nats have to offer.
Labor was unable to attack his stray shagging (pollinating out of wedlock) because they are just as, if not more, guilty of shagging their own staff. So instead they attacked his monetary entitlements as a Minister.
Unfortunately they, including a vindictive Tony Windsor, forgot he wasn’t a Minister at the time of the New England by-election. A by-election he himself brought on over dual citizenship… something Labor Members are still dishonestly avoiding.
Poor Barnaby, he could have pulled a 'Shorten' and tossed office shag, Vikki Campion, $200,000 to get an abortion and keep her mouth shut, but he chose the more honourable path of owning up.
A path that has proved much more costly, personally.
And I noticed Labor's Tony Burke, who promoted his mail girl to Senior Advisor after bonking her stupid during a taxpayer-funded world tour, was MIA when it came to Question Time.
So, much to Labor’s chagrin, next week Barnaby’s title will be, “Acting PM, Barnaby Joyce” while Malcolm is taking selfies and chatting with the Don over God knows what.
Oh, mid-life crises can lead a bloke anywhere but I would certainly not lose my testicles over some horsey looking chick determined to climb the Canberra ladder.
But love is blind and now, sans testicles, Barnaby can cross his legs with a little more ease.
It makes no sense for him to stand aside now that Labor has wrung every drop of voyeuristic juice possible out of it. It’s over!
Except that Barnaby is yet to be snapped pushing a pram around Burley Griffin. but Barnaby will stay… Lambie must go!
Yep, that rough little tart Jacqui Lambie is finished, hoisted on her own petard of disloyalty to a PUP party, and its money, that gave her a political station way above her ability.
Steve Martin has already been sworn in as an Independent and he refuses to step aside for his former Party leader. So, sorry Jacqui, but you can go home now, the already-inflated quota of 12 Senators for Tassie is full.
What has happened to this scruffy little Bogan is exactly what she did to the hapless Clive Palmer.
“Barnaby's resignation is inevitable”, said a reflective Sam Dastyari. “Politics is show business for ugly people. Most politicians aren't naturally good looking and aren't used to recognition, there is no way he can survive this. The reality is this. The amount of rooting that goes on in a place like Canberra in Parliament House”, said the ugly Iranian leprechaun to Kyle Somebastard on radio.
Oh well, politics is never boring… and what goes around comes around!