"I S’POSE A TONGUIE IS OUT OF THE QUESTION?"
Four-time Walkley Award winning political commentator and Churchill Fellow, has returned to the fray over concern that the integrity of news dissemination is continually being threatened by a partisan media.
So gay people want equality eh? Well I reckon it’s the poor straight bastards like me that cop the rough end of the pineapple. If ever equality gets dished out in equal portions, we should be first in line.
News.com.au’s Matt Young pulls no punches, he is one of those outrageous gays who openly flaunts his sexuality. Okay these bastards fancy blokes right? And in much the same way straight guys perve on sheilas they perve on blokes, are ya still with me?
I mean it’s no secret! Matt admits it... he even names his top ten yummy footballers, drooling over various body parts for his news.com.au readers.
His more lewd rants are saved for Green/Gay magazines. But Matt is a definite worry because he could decide to play football too and quite legally could get to shower with the boys.
And there is no legal requirement for Matt to tell his team mates that he gets a woody (or gets moist or whatever these blokes get) and that he needs to hide it with a towel whenever he gets to bump into all those lusciously naked male limbs and buttocks draped in lathers of soap.
Now if I tried that with the local netball team I’d need to explain my motives to a magistrate the following morning.
I have played footy for most of my life and as a former Cleo centrefold I should have been really worried about who I was showering with!
None of my team mates had voluntarily offered to shower separately, so I assume I must have showered with the odd poofter and must have bumped bums with “him”.
So sexual equality is all the rage eh? Well, would you mind if I had a piece of it because those netballers are sort of yummy?
Then again I s’pose netballers have their fair quota of lesbians too, so the poor straight buggers miss out again!
Anyone want to start an equality movement for straight people?