The Pickering Post
Wednesday, 13th December 2017

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Viv Forbes

Viv has a degree in Applied Science Geology and is a Fellow of the Australasian Institute of Mining and Metallurgy

Blog

Recycling Burps and Farts


Yesterday morning, before the frost had left the grass, I was sitting quietly beside my fashionably-green wood-burning heater reading the latest explanation in “The Green Gospel” on why the Arctic ice  had not yet melted.

Suddenly Flora burst into the room like an Arctic blizzard with a look on her face that said I was in big trouble.

“Did you tell that awful Professor Percival he could cut holes in Maria’s belly and leave her with a bum bag and a rubber sausage strapped to her back?”

“It’s all right dear” I explained patiently, “The Prof has a new job researching how to stop sheep from adding carbon compounds to the atmosphere.” (Which means, translated crudely, “how to stop sheep from burping and farting”.) 

“Well tell him to torture that awful Dorper ram that butts me, not my darling Maria. Where are those animal cruelty people when I need them”?

The Prof had coached me on the settled-science story which I now relayed confidently to Flora: “Sheep and cows release lots of carbon-rich gases from both ends. The science says this will affect the atmosphere, heat up the globe, melt the ice caps and we will all drown.” 

“He is being paid big bucks to postpone that watery judgement day.”

Fred McNally, my crusty old neighbour on the other side, was not impressed with the Prof’s reasoning. 

“Surely even a dopey hobby farmer like Percival understands the carbon cycle? Every sheep has two inlet pipes - one for food and water, one for air. And it has three exhaust pipes for wastes - liquid, solids and gases. Sheep cannot manufacture carbon. Every atom of carbon coming out of a sheep’s exhaust pipes must have come in via that sheep’s feed pipes. And every atom of carbon in the sheep feed must come from the grass which gets it from . . . the atmosphere.” 

“Sheep live on recycled burps and farts. Along the way, lots of carbon is tied up in woolly jumpers and in the bodies of sheep, lambs, dingoes and hungry humans.”

“Why pick on a non-problem like sheep? Wild dogs have already eaten half of Australia’s flock - we need a predator among the plague of clueless Professors.”

“Can’t the silly old fart see that all sheep are green?”

In the sanctimonious cant of those who preach the green religion, sheep (and cattle) should be hailed as “carbon neutral”.

Disclosure: The author does raise sheep and cattle on natural pasture, and “Maria” the pet ewe does exist.  [email protected]



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Comments

Whimsical Viv. :)). Keep 'em coming.

Funny photo..... Gullible activists bury their heads in the sand. . http://joannenova.com.au/2014/09/gullible-activists-bury-their-heads-in-the-sand/

I wish the climate muck up by the UN/NATO wasn't true but evidence proves it is sadly, and a disaster for the planet.

May not be all it seems, the UN ,NATO experiment in the northern hemisphere is a disaster not many know due to the media not reporting it .If what Dane Wigington says in geoengineeringwatch.com is lie tell me where your proof that it's VF. It's like the UN's "global depopulation policy" very few know about it or seem to want to know.

Vegetarians cause global warming i.e we need more predators to kill the bastards off start with the vegans ,then PETA ,WWF ,animal rights loonies

Dinosaur Farts wiped out the dinosaurs ! not a meteor that hit the Gulf of Mexico ! the truth comes out ....................what Greenie ,PETA is going to kill all the sheep and cattle off? so we dont have to face the inevitable doom of Global Warming ?

Google "Le Petomane". He put the art into fart.

Just noticed a fascinating little fact. On this day in Sydney the highest recorded temperature was 27.1 degrees way back in 1947.

In a rare letter to Mr. Craig Fugate, the Administrator of the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA), the Space and Science Research Corporation (SSRC), has disclosed that we are about to enter a potentially catastrophic period of record earthquakes and volcanic eruptions throughout the United States.
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The letter was signed by SSRC President, Mr. John Casey, and delivered to FEMA headquarters in Washington, D.C. today. In the letter, Mr. Casey outlines how the ongoing dramatic reduction in the Sun’s energy output will not only plunge the world into a decades-long cold epoch, but at the same time bring record geophysical devastation in monster earthquakes and volcanic eruptions.
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These cold climate periods called “solar hibernations” or “solar minimums” are well known phenomena in the solar physics community. The SSRC has done important pioneering work in the field of solar- climate modeling and has established itself as a leader in climate prediction and the study of these hibernations of the Sun.

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http://www.spaceandscience.net/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderfiles/ssrcpressrelease32015earthquakeandvolcanothreatforusaincreases.PDF

Rice and Methane

http://news.ucdavis.edu/search/news_detail.lasso?id=10382

ViV. Did you mention sheep and cattle ? Mia ( my avatar) is excited . Great article as usual ..

Methane is also a problem ..

Methane emissions
http://www.landcareresearch.co.nz/science/greenhouse-gases/agricultural-greenhouse-gases/methane-emissions

Feed additive slashes emissions
http://adf.farmonline.com.au/news/magazine/livestock/feeding-nutrition/feed-additive-slashes-emissions/2739730.aspx

Supplement to reduce cow flatulence 'could slash greenhouse gases and help save the planet'
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/supplement-reduce-cow-flatulence-could-6200041

That's not a baaaaaaaaad story Viv!

So how does CO2 cause global warming/climate change? -
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For something to be be heated it must either absorb EM radiation, or it must be heated by some hot object it's in contact with. Air doesn't absorb light so it can't be directly heated by sunlight. Instead the sunlight passes through the air and heats the ground, and the ground heats the air.
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The expansion comes in because the hot air that is heated by the ground rises. However as it rises it's volume increases and therefore it's temperature decreases. So the decrease in temperature with height is indeed due to expansion, but this is only the case because air is heated from below by the ground.
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If air absorbed light directly it would heat up independantly of the ground and we would not see the same temperature variation with height. In fact exactly this effect happens in the stratosphere. In the upper reaches of the stratosphere ozone molecules [O3] absorb ultraviolet light and heat up, and in the stratosphere temperature increases with height instead of decreasing.
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http://physics.stackexchange.com/questions/40949/why-less-temperature-at-high-altitude

Lock up your gates when Viv and his foreign mining mates are around.

Viv entertaining and educational as always!

Viv, we could be here all day with the distortions
Sheep don't make carbon that's true, but nobody said they did
Just the same I eat as much of the buggers as I can, to be safe.