The Pickering Post
Sunday, 22nd October 2017

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Archive

ANTHROPOGENIC WARMING?

... it's a load of old fish droppings

The ABC’s school science program has recruited Dr (funny shirts) Karl to enlighten kids to the perils of global warming and the evils of scepticism.


Dear Uncle Kev,

I was really upset to see you crying and I just want to let you know that a lot of people were crying with you. Even my Great Aunt Mavis was crying, because her hip replacement ball thing fell out.


CAPTAIN CHAOS LEAVES SHORTEN IN THE SHIT

Although the ALP is exhaling in relief at Kevin Rudd’s departure, it will be a short-lived respite, as Kev is now set to cause further havoc from the grave. A by-election in the seat of Griffith is something the hapless Shorten needs like a hole in his ample head.



WE WILL MISS YOU UNCLE KEV...

It's difficult to find words that aptly describe your momentous contribution to Australia's political scene. But I will try.


BRONWYN NOT WELCOME IN PARTY ROOM

Fancy being honoured with the position of Speaker only to be told you are no longer welcome in the Party room! But our Aunty Bronnie intends to attend... just not to tactics meetings, that's all.


TWO BISHOPS, AN ABBOTT AND THE DEVIL

Bronwyn Bishop, today elected as Speaker of the House, is one of the more respected MPs with a history of dedicated service and an angelic grandma persona.


Rugby League and Australia's first suicide bomber

It’s only a matter of time. There will be an Islamic All Stars Rugby League round. For those, like me, who have a sense of humour, it will probably be squashed in between the Gay Appreciation week and Sorry For Anything That Christianity Has Ever Done decade.


The Climate See-saw


INDO CONFRONTATION NOW INEVITABLE

... thanks to the Opposition

If Indonesia’s Opposition had spoken in the same terms regarding sensitive foreign policy matters as our Opposition has, they would find themselves eating porridge.


HOW AN MP'S CHEAT SHEET WORKS



TALKING TOUGH IS NOT ENOUGH

Tony Abbott: "... and if any boat ever set out from Australia to Indonesia to enter that country illegally, we would do our damnedest to stop it." Well that’s pretty tough talk to a Liberal Party Conference but did the Indonesians hear that expression of gross unfairness?


ABBOTT LOSES IN THE FIRST ROUND!

It was the first opportunity Tony Abbot had to get in the ring with SBY and show him we are not prepared to have our immigration policy dictated to us by a corrupt third world nation. But our Tony didn’t land a punch... instead, he threw in the towel.


IS YOUR CHILD'S LIFE WORTH ONLY FOUR YEARS?

Talk to the average cop on Saturday night duty, like I did, and he will explain that alcohol is behind the murderous violence on our streets.


CSIRO A COSY NEST FOR THE LEFT

As reported in the Post earlier this year, the CSIRO will be high on Abbott’s hit-list.


MID-OCEAN STANDOFF, Fairfax claims

It was not a mid-ocean anything as HMAS Ballarat last night responded to a distress call a mere 57 kilometers from the Indonesian coast and well within their own search and rescue zone.



FAIRFAX DYING IN AN IDEOLOGICAL DUNNY

Hostile takeover vultures are circling the corpse of Fairfax ensuring there is no sign of life before swooping in to safely digest the entrails of a once proud beast.


SPYING?

... be discreet about it please

Julie Bishop’s Indonesian counterpart, Mohammad Marty Natalegawa, is in posturing election mode when he says Australia’s spying could impede Indonesia’s current cooperation on people smuggling. Is Marty suggesting an original lack of cooperation? Yes he is! But he didn’t mean to say it.

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